Verified by Psychology Today. Living Single. The popular stories of our time do not make it easy for single people to define themselves without referring to marriage. And they make it especially challenging for single women with no kids to discuss their lives without mentioning motherhood or family. The dominant narrative assumes a particular timeline for our adult lives: By a certain age, we marry, and then we have kids.
Eat when I want, what I want, as much or as little as I want. Go where I want or not want. I actually enjoy my company and I also like to people watch.
Despite all of those things, I've come to the conclusion that you can be happy being single. Life is what you make it. I will be the best whether I'm a single woman. Of course, that means you'll have to deal with the BS struggles of being a girl who's happy being single. 1. No one believes you. You don't mind being alone. At one point or another, we're all single. In fact, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, there are more single people in America,
I enjoy the time away from all the madness to sit and reflect with a nice meal and a beverage. At times I miss having someone special to leave love notes or text me sweet things. Not sex or physical intimacy. The little things that give you the butterflies in your tummy feeling. Meaningless sex does nothing for me. I remember going on trips with my previous partner and it was nothing but hell. Travelling is so much more enjoyable and I get to spend time meeting new people and other solo travellers.
Like how to put air in my car tires, how to drywall, paint, screen windows, check the oil in the car and other rand om little things I never used to know how to do.
I do now. I have lots of that. Iva is a freelance writer, blogger and author from Sudbury, Ontario, Canada. Her first book "The Shear Truth" is a funny and informative book that covers her 20 year career as a hairstylist.
A lifetime of professional and personal challenges has ignited a passion in her to help people face their fears, chase their dreams and live ridiculously happy lives.
Join her on Facebook here for daily inspiration or go to her website ivaursano. While you're there, why not sign up for her monthly musings and receive the free guide "21 days to a New You". You can change these settings at any time. Just when you thought it was the ladies who want nothing more than to 'put a ring on it', a new study has shown that it's actually them who feel fantastic about being single.
And apparently, the single ladies aren't looking to tie the knot or settle down anytime soon either. So the big question, in this case, is: why?
Why is it that women are happier to be single? The main reason is that they feel that relationships are simply hard work. And here many of us were thinking that the reason would be complex?
They are not just thinking in boundary-busting ways; they are also going out there and creating new ways of living that are not dependent on having a spouse and children.
Then sometimes the people who are married with children follow along, realizing that they, too, would like to think about family in less limiting ways, or that they, too, covet some alone time and a space of their own. I wish the single women and the authors had acknowledged the structural barriers that make things harder for single people. These include, for example, policies that benefit and protect only people who are legally married.
There are more than 1, of them in the U. They also include all the goods and services that cost less per person for couples than for individuals, and all the informal practices that make single people feel marginalized, such as social events at which guests are all expected to be coupled.
In what strikes me as a very promising finding, not even one of the 12 single women in the study mentioned any concerns with any of those issues. But their lives are different now. They are living their lives more fully, rather than putting their dreams on hold. They have their eyes on future prizes, such as better jobs and home ownership, and are doing what it takes to attain them.
As I write this on Friday, Jan. I mention this in case you have been trying to contact me and have not gotten a response.
We may have suspected it already, but now the science backs it up: unmarried and childless women are the happiest subgroup in the. Walking right behind them is a single woman and she looks pretty darned happy too. She's smiling and glowing and has a wonderful light skip in her step. How to Be a Happy Single Woman. You've heard the old-fashioned message that you need to be married to be a truly happy woman. Perhaps that was truer at.
I feel fortunate to be safe at a time when others nearby have perished, or their homes have been destroyed. But it is heartbreaking to think of what others are going through. People are way too concerned with what other people think. My life is way too valuable to hand over to other people's opinions.
How to Be a Happy Single Woman. By: Contributor. Feeling a little down in the dumps 'cause it's a Saturday night and it seems the whole world is paired off. Women who say they are happily single and do not want children are not living the lives they are “supposed to” live. They are at risk of having.
The tragedy of feminism--specifically third wave--has been making enemies of men. It was not necessary to make marriage a risky endeavor in order for a certain personality-type to live alone. Whatever one's thoughts on spirituality, the human body is a biological machine designed to reproduce. There will always be questions surrounding why a person did or did not marry. Marriage or co-habitation what males is often a risky endeavor.
Most women who are assaulted or murdered are murdered at the hands of their partner ir husband. This is not a result of feminism. It's a result of male violence, which feminism is a reaction to.
I've never gotten married but I do have children, who are now adults. Yet still I'm incessantly asked by family, friends, acquaintances and strangers why I don't have a man and when I'm going to get one. The answer is never. I'm simply not intre3sted. I've had several relationships with men over the years and most of them were violent, abusive, demanding or emotionally draining.
I'm not willing to invest my time or energy into that anymore. I have my own job, my own money, my own home, friends, family and my pets. It's not necessary for a woman to have a man to be happy. Sometimes, it's quite the opposite.
I think the majority of women could do just fine without a man. Especially after 40 years old. Everybody comes with significant baggage. I am just not into taking that on. I don't hate men. Unfortunately, it seems the ones worth being with are all coupled up.
So, I've learned to be very happy single. I look around at other women my age mid 50s and feel so fortunate. You could say I'm single both by default and by choice. But I have made the choice to be happy. I am no longer ashamed or embarrassed. Menopause has been a gift in more ways than one. Thank you! I am a married man with 26 years of married life with happiness.
I love your judgment. Talking about an enemy, dominance and so on! I think believing in God not necessarily the one that is talked about in some churches or mosquesmakes us have a deep respect for each other, thoughts and opinions. Not necessarily sacrificing, but trying to help each other eagerly, husband for wife, wife for husband, a friend for friend, relatives.
If a married life is being to become a nightmare, nobody is there to help and consultation does not work anymore, or for any social, psychological or physical reason, we prefer not to marry, Ok decide what to do now. There are many, many men who are never violent or abusive. And women who have been in an abusive relationship are far more likely to pick another man who is abusive man inadvertently, often relating to an unfortunate background of their own not their fault.
Unfortunately, just like silly men's rights activists who bitch and moan about women forever, and would never marry one, there are also women who feel all men are abusive and they say "not again". Sad because in the meantime there are millions of couples who've been married for decades and get along just fine, without a single instance of abuse whatsoever. Just happy Christmases and love, year after year -- just the kind of thing resentful and cynical men and women don't believe could ever happen.
That's nice. Good for them. I'm just not interested in taking that risk or investing that energy anymore. There are women who lived long, happy lives with their partners who ended up being cheated on, abandoned or even murdered by their partners after 50 years of happy marriage. There are also many couples in denial about their mutual misery and put on a brave face for the sake of the family or for their public image.
There are happily married women whose husbands have been cheating on them with other women or prostitutes for decades, who have no idea. I'm simply not willing to invest my time and energy into that. It doesn't make me bitter or cynical. It's just based on my own life experiences and what I see other women endure. No thanks. I'll stick to independence, freedom and my darling cats! Yes, there are all those things, and then there are also many women who've had long happy married lives. Sorry you're not one of them.
Yes to this, too!Study: Women Are Happier When Single
I'm one of those women you describe and I had absolutely no idea. And I've seen many of the other examples you describe. So because of all of that, I've made a conscience choice to live the 2nd half of my life solo. We only get one life. Someone also mentioned therapy upthread. Yeah, that's important for women who have been traumatized by men.
It doesn't necessarily have anything to do with their continued choices. Love this part of your comment.
And I'm getting there myself. Dating has been off and on yet only as part of the struggle of that cultural conditioning. I've learned a ton more about myself and can finally say without reservation that I'm living my very best life single.
I'm not a marriage or relationship basher, yet I don't see many of those around me that seem healthy or happy.
Choosing not to marry or cohabitate or even date men is not a tragedy nor is it making men an enemy. If you define that as a tragedy then you have not left your basement.
Here's the real reason why women are happier being single
Stretch, I have several lifelong single male friends who live high quality lives and are quite pleasant to be around. They are good friends to many people. Would you call them enemies to women and a tragedy because they have chosen to remain single? I do not understand your stance on this. Why are you so concerned about women's romantic choices? Were you spurned or want to have reproductive control over all women?
What is your real beef here? This is your erroneous takeaway from a dangerous political movement.
Third wave feminism is anti-male, anti-family and anti-sanity. Pretending men and women are interchangeable is a fool's errand. This insanity affects all, not just women, single OR married. It's cultural marxist hogwash and deserves to be mocked and dismantled. I stand by my statement that people have choices on how to live, whether it be marriage or not, cohabitation or not, reproducing or not.
Be they male or female. Shoe horning people into roles that do not fit is going by the wayside. The script is being rewritten and you won't be able to change it. I was pregnant twice. I became seriously depressed both times even though my partner was loving and supported me regardless of my decision. Being pregnant just doesn't work with my physiology; I get depressed, aggitated, and even violent.
The first time, I was very releived once I had the abortion. Luckily, I miscarried the second time before I had to pay for the second abortion. Glad to be on birth control now. Not ALL women want kids - get it through your head AND not all women are hormonally gear to carry a child either - it literally drives some of us crazy even if we are normally mild mannered, kind, and intelligent.
Nobody thinks Bella is a future crazy cat lady. I don't think I can emphasize that enough. And she definitely is not single by necessity.
Look at that gorgeous face! She could have any man she wanted. There are hundreds of men outside her door on their knees with diamond rings, dying to marry her. But she doesn't want any of them.
Woman single and happy
So happy in singlehood that she can't stop telling us for even five minutes how great it is. Does that sound like protesting too much? There is nothing wrong with cat ladies as well as being single - by choice or not.
We do not live in an age of patriarchy. A woman's relationship status is not anyone's business but hers. Love my cat and couldn't care less if people call me a crazy cat lady. My cat is a blessing in my life. Misogynists everywhere are terrified of happy single women. This is upending their game of insisting women behave a certain arch-conservative way in order to fulfill their proper socially approved destiny: Committing to one man and life-long marriage.
What other possible reason would there be for men to get so defensive and angry about women who choose to live alone? How does it effect them? It's the same with lesbians. Some men can't stand it that lesbians don't center men. They want to 'convert' them, even rape them to 'correct' them This is one of the reasons I choose not to have men as intimate partners. The male ego is just too much drama. You apparently haven't met any good men. They're out there. About as silly a generalization as saying all women are gold-diggers, or all women are "drama queens".
I am sure there are plenty of good men out there. I'm just done searching for one. If that leaves my good-man soulmate that is out there unattached, well, he's now available for another woman.